Not a Cult / NACULT

The Totally Normal, Not-At-All-Strange History of Not a Cult

Long ago—like, three major patches and a hotfix ago—a prophecy echoed through the codebase. It spoke of He Who Cannot Die, a glitched being of such resilience, so outrageously bugged, that death itself simply gave up trying. His health bar remained stubbornly full, his armor stat overflowed into scientific notation, and even the devs couldn’t explain it. They tried. Oh, they tried.

And from this miraculous malfunction, Not a Cult was born.

In the early days, we were but a handful of sleep-deprived players, whispering patch notes beneath the pale light of dual monitors. We donned armor in bed—not for protection, but for devotion. We carried 12 medpens at all times, just in case. Of what? No one knew. But He Who Cannot Die had carried them, and so must we.

Our motto became our mission:

“Death is a suggestion. We decline.”

We reject the respawn screen. We transcend patch notes. We log in, not to play, but to ascend.

Today, we are many. We are weirdly organized. And we’re still totally, completely, absolutely Not a Cult. Promise.

Join us.
(But, like, casually. No pressure. Just wear your armor and memorize the prophecy.)